Two of the three most traumatic events of my life are abortions.
The first when I was about 20 seemed excusable due to relative poverty, the woman (now my ex-wife) never said a word about why she did it. I had only a few days from her abrupt change of heart until she did it and I could not talk her out of it. The child was planned and celebrated, then destroyed upon a whim. I should have left the woman but drowning in despair I did not.
The second when I was about 30 was something I again fought against unsuccessfully. My inability to talk my wife out of aborting that child (complicated by her denial of its existence) left me feeling so useless that I nearly killed myself. I pulled myself back from the brink (and I understand why people ‘cut’ themselves) due to recollecting how a friend was affected by her father committing suicide- so I stayed alive for the sake of my children (then 5 and 3 years old).
I have only had fleeting remembrances of joy since then (1984), and little of comfort or peace. The loss of a child is hard, harder when so many deny it ever existed.
And yet I oppose the present anti-abortion legislation. My reasons in descending importance:
- it will only slightly reduce the number of abortions and is likely to lead to the deaths of women;
- it is unjust in that it will disproportionally affect the poor, the people who have the most justifications for it;
- I am not fit to judge my fellow man, and have not met anyone else who is;
- the government has shown itself NOT competent in matters of life and death, but is driven instead by ideology and political theater catering to the more vicious emotions of humanity;
- if the proposed laws had been in force back then my ex-wife may have died, denying my living children their mother;
- the means taken to pass the bill: Special sessions should be restricted to urgent business. To state that abortion has become urgent after 40 years is disingenuous at best, and clearly being done for political reasons, not for the health of the women involved. The voting rules of our great state are an attempt to keep bare majorities from deciding significant matters. If you can’t get a bill passed in the regular session then the issue needs to percolate in the minds and spirits of the population for a few more years.